Summer Love!

A few weeks back my youngest and I found ourselves spending the day just the two of us.  It doesn’t happen very often and what made it even more rare was that we had nothing special on the calendar, just a whole day to hang out doing as we pleased.  We decided on a mid afternoon movie, had lots of laughs, and enjoyed every minute of it.  Then, and I’m not even sure how this happened, just when I thought I’d squeezed out every ounce of enjoyment I could from a day like that, I found myself holding hands with my son as we walked to our car…just like that…like it happens every day! 

         Of course, the truth is, it used to happen every day, years ago.  And like so many other little routine things that happened back then, I took it for granted, unable to appreciate then that it would not last forever.  But not this time, this was one of those fleeting moments when all of my senses were on high alert.  I could actually feel a calm awareness take over my body allowing me to calmly breath in the full awareness of what I held in my hand; a special gift that I should fully appreciate for each second I could before letting go. 

I wanted time to stand still. It took me back, just for a few seconds, to the days of squeezing those sticky fingers between my own to do any old random thing. 

  Or the time I didn’t grab hold and he darted right into the street, narrowly avoiding the front bumper of a thankfully alert driver’s car, the feeling of both shock and relief when I scooped him up safe in my arms.  Back to the time when each chubby finger had its own dimple instead of a knuckle, where I often would leave a lipstick reminder of “I love you” before heading out the door for work.  That spot where I would rub my thumb back and forth, connected together in a way you can’t truly appreciate until you don’t have the chance to do it any more.

            So, for this little slice of heaven to slide quietly into my grasp for just a few seconds, I would gladly give up many other things.  And then, just like that, we hopped in the car and went on with our day, almost like it never happened. 

But I know it did.  And I know that those glimpses of “little boy” are getting further apart and I had better pay attention or I will miss some of the last looks I’m going to get at the real treasures of summer, when the days are long, and I can catch them being little a few more times.  

 This summer I’m spending a little time quietly observing whenever I find the chance.

I love when I can sneak away to a quiet spot where they don’t know I am even on the planet, and I can watch them at play.  Oh, I know the rules. I have been instructed that it must be referred to as “hanging out”, not “playing”, at this advanced age they’ve attained.  But I know what I see.

One moment, they are couched down hiding behind a tree or fence, the next they spring up and sprint off in another direction.  I catch them tip toeing past and shake my head in conspiracy as they quietly indicate with one finger that we must be very quiet because the hunt is on and we will be doomed if they are discovered! Their feet are bare and grass stained.  They don’t know or don’t care that the mosquito population is getting fat off of them.  They have no idea they are filling the entire neighborhood with echoes.

            It’s the best part of summer and I am in the heart of it, managing sunscreen, band aides, fireflies, and swimsuits and towels littering the porch. It’s the best love affair I know of kids and their summer vacation and I want to hang on to being a part of it as long as I can, crouched here in my hiding place where I’m hoping I won’t be found!